Saturday, August 13, 2011

the fight

20 lbs down. Things are slow but well. Still feeling focused and I've been working out quite consistently. 30 minutes of cardio or weights or both. Sometimes a 3.5 mile walk or a bike ride where I live on sunny days. Not necessarily challenging myself, but at least I'm trying?

And it's so darn hard to cut out carbs completely. And summer time is always the hardest time for me. The heat. The lack of motivation to cook. The Alcohol. But 20 lbs in four months is pretty decent, even though if I followed it strictly, I'd probably weigh A LOT less by now.

Lately I've been feeling the sense of loss, like that feeling in the pit of my stomach when I don't get to eat something I want. Like the other day I passed up a buffalo chicken quesadilla, all hot and cheesy. I had a buffalo chicken salad instead and it was good but still.... That longing for "normal" eating, like how everyone else gets to.

I suppose this is how it will go. Forever. All over again. Healthy in, healthy out.

Monday, June 27, 2011

fatty is trying

I am doing relatively well.

Down about 15 lbs and still going. I cheat occasionally- a piece of bread here, spoon fulls of Adam's rice or pasta, but sticking to the diet and going with the ups and down. I'm debating on whether or not to drop another $300 for month #4 or try to go out on my own. I feel positive, but I don't want to rely on this food forever, plus it's boring after awhile.

I'm going to the gym and working out, weights and 30 mins of cardio at a clip. On sunny days, I walk around my "block" which is 3.5 miles.

ALSO- I got tired of feeling sorry for myself so I joined a women's rugby team, and will be practicing on Tues/Thurs. Rugby is very physically demanding, but the alcohol typically consumed after games will be tricky to navigate. I don't have to worry about that until fall though.

Monday, June 6, 2011

doing this

Down 12-13 lbs on medifast. Joined a gym. Last post was on phone and it didn't go through.

Things are going well, I've been making excellent dinners using just veggies and meat (or meatless options!) and Adam has been really supportive.

How are YOU doing?

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

food for thinking

I am tired of eating.

A few weeks ago, I brought fancy new customized sneakers. I have gone walk/jogging a few times and I am enjoying it very much. I downloaded a cool application that talks to me and shares my progress during the activity. I like this.

I don't like eating.

After much debate in my mind and more research and almost a year, I decided to purchase MEDIFAST. It should be here soon. I feel like a cheater, but I'm just really at a loss of what else to try/do. Was contemplating Overeaters Anonymous, but the meetings are too far. I am rationalizing that I will lose weight, jumpstart myself and maintain whatever I lose.

Wishful thinking, but sometimes desperate times call for chocolate vitamin milkshakes.

I am just done with leaning on food to help me feel better. I am finished with impulsive eating. I need to STOP! and THINK! when food is around, but my willpower is lacking. I know what things taste like, I have access to things but I still feel this rush sometimes when I'm eating.

It needs to stop.

I am going to work on changing my relationship with food completely. Maybe this is the push I need to get it changing.

Sunday, March 27, 2011

can i?

I have found something I'm slightly excited about.

Walkjogging! I have been going outside to get some movement in for a few weeks now, and yesterday I bought special sneakers and new supportive bras to get going. It's something I think I can commit to.

The first time, I walked about 2 miles. Last weekend, I walk-jogged 3.5 miles. Yesterday I got a little over 4 miles in. It feels like an accomplishment to me and on my own terms. I can walk as long as I want to and with the weather getting nicer, I have time to do it after work. PLUS- it's one thing I can do in the middle of nowhere. PLUS PLUS-it's less expensive than joining a gym.

It counts as long I'm making effort to move my ass!

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Quickie update:

Since Jan 15th I have lost 6.2 pounds. I joined WW at Work, which means my employer pays half of 12 week tuition for the program. It's run by a colleague and it's held every Wednesday morning in the cafeteria, which is waaayy more convenient than shlepping around to find a random meeting around here. Morning is also good because I weigh less in the AM :-)

I have seriously written down everything I've been eating and am starting to feel better about my choices. More fruit! More veggies! More healthy protein! Actually thinking about things BEFORE I put them into my face. Weighing all options. Getting support from my fiancee.

I still have the bursitis in my shoulders, that flares up when it's precipitating or about to...which in upstate NY is every other day at this point. I also was seriously out of breath yesterday walking up a slight hill in the snow.

I have made a commitment to myself. When I hit 10 pounds down, I will spring for the fancy gym membership at the local Y. You may think: why isn't she joining now to lose the weight? I agree with you, reader, but I want to start by getting my body re accustomed to the smaller portions before I start seriously exercising. This way I won't need to over eat or compensate for calories expended. Plus, I want to reward myself for 10 lbs down of eating healthy, proving to myself that I can do this. In my defense, I am going to try to incorporate some at home DVDs and the P90X sessions that I like. TRY.