Sunday, November 16, 2008

life happens

So, yeah, um today's PLAN was to work the preggo house from 8 am - 4 pm, go the gym (for the first time since 11/3/08!) and then come home to write a comprehensive case evaluation for my 22 yr old heroin addict patient who's been trying to commit suicide for 7 years. Maybe eat some dinner, get to bed by 10 pm.

At the preggo house, one of the teen girls I was close with who moved to another placement called and said she gave birth to her second child this morning and wanted me to come see him. So after work, I went to the hospital and spent about an hour holding him and talking with her and her boyfriend.

No gym. BUT I did just do 20 minutes of my Pilates DVD to re-introduce myself to exercise. So I feel slightly better. Now I have to write a serious paper that's due tomorrow night.

Sometimes, I feel that I should just stop trying to lose these last 10 or so pounds. I look good and I'm really healthy (I think?) . Do I really want to give up and maintain this weight and continue struggling to get free Weight Watchers? Or am I just frustrated for feeling like a loser?

What I do know, right now, in this very moment? That my brocoli soup smells delicious and I'm going to eat it while I write this dang paper.

6 comments:

MizFit said...

you know me. Im all about this:
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I look good and I'm really healthy.
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and throw in ENJOYING LIFE & youre set.

is that where youd be were you NOT to lose 10 more pounds?

Mandapants said...

I'm with MizFit. You do look great. And you are healthy. And I've questioned myself the same way lately...like, does the arbitrary goal *really* matter? I think what we can *definitely* bank on is that we should be proud of ourselves for how far we've come, regardless of whether or not we continue to lose.

Also, don't forget other fitness goals! People remind me about that a lot. It's not *just* about a certain size or a number. It's about overall healthy lifestyle, forever and ever.

And ever. Lol.

Tricia said...

I'm with the other two. Especially about the arbitrary goal. If this weight is something that you feel you can maintain long-term, and not have to fight to keep from gaining back a few pounds (which, due to frustration, can snowball, or at least that's how it is in my family), then I say relax.

I'd also recommend a yoga or meditation DVD as a sort of stop-gap for when you're stressed.

auntie said...

i'm no expert (at anything, really) but i'm kinda thinking maybe you're having difficulty with those last 10 pounds because you're so busy and stressed right now, and even if you were able to make it to the gym on a more regular basis it might not make a difference. i remember my doctor telling me once about how your body kind of goes into "survival mode" when you're under stress for a long period of time, and it tends to hang on to whatever body you've got at the time. something to do with our roots as cavemen, i think!

anyway, i agree with the others - if you feel like you look good and are really healthy, then i say, all is well in the world. enjoy where you are right now and don't add more stress to your life by worrying about those last few pounds.

tokaiangel said...

Arbitrary is a good word. That is what the number is.

The thing to gun for is health and happiness, as everyone says. It strikes me that this may not be a carefree time in your life when you can pootle on down to the gym whenever it takes your fancy. Am I right? Am I? Did I pass? Don't put undue pressure on yourself, there's only so much a superhero can bear, and maybe this is one thing too many.

MY opinion? I would take a break from it for now - just concentrate on eating right and healthy for get-up-and-go.

TA x

fattygetsfit said...

maybe i will stop "pressuring" myself to lose this last stretch and see what happens for myself.

thanks for the kind words and the encouragement. you gals are AWESOME