I was rejoicing on Sunday when the calendar said FEBRUARY! It meant my January from h-e-double hockey sticks was over. And my 25th around the corner (2.28) So today, someone left a bottle of diet pills on my desk. Then I accidentally smashed the front bumper of the work vehicle and got yelled at TWICE; once for not knowing about the smash and once for making a sassy comment. Did I mention someone put diet pills on my desk?
I worked out on Saturday & Sunday. Last night I came home and did a little Pilates DVD. Tonight I am off, because I have soreness in my inner thighs and triceps. And because it's really cold outside.
So I am getting back on the workout track and I've quit smoking, for like, the bajillionth time. So I am craving sweets like a mofo. And since I'm confessing my sins to my anonymous public, for the first time EVER in my life, I purposely turned out the lights on Saturday night when spending time with my boyfriend. I was too ashamed of how my body looked now that I've gained some (possibly imaginary) weight.
Like Tony, I have some fat scars of my own. When I was a chubber, I was convinced that my body was fine but that I was ugly. So I believed I was normal weight and paraded around as such. It wasn't until I lost any that I realized two things. 1) I'm halfway decent looking and 2) I shouldn't have worn some of those outfits.
Now, I cover up. I am very conscious about how I look, even though I'm thinner than I was in high school. My confidence was only shaken when I lost the weight. How counter intuitive and lady like?