Sunday, May 6, 2007

word to the wise

Weight loss is NOT a cure-all for your life's problems. It doesn't make it easier to have clients who sometimes hurt/allow others to hurt their children. It doesn't alleviate stress at work. It doesn't make 10 page research papers or finals do themselves. It doesn't give you financial security or make your bills go away (unless you get a sugar daddy, of course). It doesn't help with large cysts in your ovaries now causing you pain on a daily basis. And it certainly doesn't stop your fraudulent boyfriend (now, ex) from cheating on you with his ex-girlfriend, or whomever else he was cheating with for that matter. Losing the weight didn't make me smarter, nicer or better at handling life's shit.

So what HAS it done? Losing these 20 pounds has made me value my health a lot more than the last time around. I get to tell doctors that I'm losing weight to avoid future health issues. It gets me compliments from people, and the ability to inspire others to get healthy themselves. It's been getting me attention from the opposite sex, which boosts my confidence level even more. I finally get to wear clothes that look good, not just ones that fit me. This time around, I've really changed my lifestyle. It's just not a diet anymore.

To be honest, I ate pretty awful this weekend. It was my rugby alumni weekend and I celebrated in style. But instead of going crazy and eating A TON of bad stuff, I only ate a little bit of it. I had pizza, onion rings, guacamole and of course, french fries. But I didn't over do it. I really got to eat exactly what I wanted, in moderation. I'm probably going to pay dearly for it on the scale tomorrow afternoon (I'm working all day Monday, hence why I am updating now) but I'm OK with that. My appetite is finally BACK, I can sleep without pills and overall I'm feeling good again, like a human being. I think it's safe to say that my "Month From Hell" has come to an end.

So...what's next? I've done a little mathematical equation, and I'm setting December 2007 as the time I'd like to be down these next 25 pounds. Weight Watchers offers LIFETIME membership (a.k.a. meetings and weigh-in's fo' FREE!) if you reach your goal weight and maintain it for 6 weeks. Until then, I pay for my meetings, which adds up on a monthly basis. This doesn't seem too unrealistic, in fact I see it as a motivating factor. I think December/January is a good time to attain goal. I gives me 7 more months of hard work to accomplish it. Plus...I just don't feel like paying anymore than I have to, they should really pay me.

In closing, I think it's kind of funny how I initially started this blog to humiliate myself into losing weight. I really didn't think I'd still be writing in it 5 months later, or that I'd be this successful and driven to continue to lose and maintain. And I certainly didn't realize the impact I'd have on people reading this. If it wasn't for people telling me they read every week, I might have given up!
(hi lindsey!)

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